It’s amazing how old feelings resurface
Lack of control
Feeling cornered and trapped
Heart-wrenching knots in my stomach

They are in the past
But so ingrained
He is gone
Yet the scars remain

I’m stronger now
Yet, I find myself weak
I am free now
But I sometimes feel chained

Why does the healing come so slow?
Reliving the past
Anticipating the future
Finding my truth is what I do

Will it get better?
Is it through his actions or my own?
Is it me that creates these demons?
Perhaps I will never know