Originally posted by The Freelancer. Yes, this is what healing feels like.
Well, I’ve done it again.
After committing to yet another project of putting this site together, I got cold feet and gave up for a bit. This is nothing new for me.
As maybe other survivors can attest, doubting yourself is a very real consequence of an abusive relationship. The constant wondering of whether you’re good enough for anything you set your mind to is exhausting.
Then, it’s inevitably followed by a self-empowered month or two of “I can do anything!”. Full of ideas of how to help others and put your past experiences to good use.
The cycle repeats itself. It’s like going in and out of consciousness. You dream of being the Joan of Arc that leads others into battle with their pasts, but then you wake to reality only to realize that could never be you. You’re not good enough.
You’re exactly what he said you were.
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